One of the fabulous things about being a Mediocre Mama is that you don't get too bunched when you're mediocre babysitter screws up. I grant you, I'm currently living in Spain, thousands of miles from grandparents or friends you can grub off of for a few peaceful hours, so I am truly not that picky. She speaks English, she gets herself to my apartment. Beyond that I really don't need much more. But after another day of babysitting foul ups I thought it proper to share some of the better ones.
First, in the interest of full disclosure, I should mention that when I was a teenager I managed to close a toddlers finger in a door while I was sitting. The finger made it and she's currently a 16 year old young woman, enjoying the many benefits of 10 fingers.
Alright, I've purged. Now onto my babysitter. Just so you know, despite all this I still think she's great. But it's funny how desperation for an outing reduces your standards just a little bit. He always comes out in one piece and I suppose I can't complain too hard, but I just figure I'd let you know what you get for 8 Euros an hour in Spain:
1. One night she put him to bed with his feety pajamas over his shoes;
2. On one particular occasion she left the side of the crib down and he did the big jump (I forgive this one, however, because I had that thought...hmmm, must check on side of the crib...instead passed out and woke to a thud);
3. One night he woke up at 2 am, literally in a puddle. This was the day that I learned what that Huggies blue liquid leak capacity is;
4. 2 weeks ago she put his rock-n-roll Ernie doll in the crib with him. I cannot tell you how jarring it is to wake up at 3 am after a lot of wine and a limoncello to "Splish Splash I was taking a bath"; and
5. Today, as well as every other time, she managed to put his stinky diaper in the wrong pail. I totally understand forgetting which pail to use. But what I don't get is that she is unaware of the odor. I mean, honestly, my house doesn't smell like shit when she walks in. It's just odd to me that she doesn't go, hmm weird...it smells like shit every time I leave here.
Anyway, at least it gets me out of the house...
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2 comments:
Feety PJs over shoes? Really? Poor Jesse...
But at least you go out! I envy you...
I have a good babysitting story, although I was the one being babysitted(is that a word?):
I was about 6 or so and I had currently discovered a new favorite drink: Tang. Remember that stuff? Sweet orangy powdery drink that always left a stain on your upper lip? Well, I told my babysitter that my mother ALWAYS let me put at least 10 teaspoons of the powder in a glass before dilluting it con agua. Either she was really stupid or I was really persuasive.
Needless to say, within minutes our backyard was covered in orange vomit from yours truly. To this day, I don't think I've ever had the courage to tell this story. Not even Mom knows about it. I've either been scarred permanently from the experience (it really was a good drink!), or I'm still trying to protect the babysitter - whose name escapes me and is probably about 40 right now - who stupidly believed me when I said my stomach was made of iron. Think Captain Kid is hiding the facts from you already? ("Senorita Babysitter let me watch 10 episodes of Sex in the City!!" ...oh wait, that was you).
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